The X Factor: Live Show 7 Review

Posted by Judy Johnson On Monday, 22 November 2010 22:43
It's a little late this week because I was busy getting out of the house. Unheard of, I know. I then tried to explain to my non-X Factor-watching friend that the show is actually good and does produce good singers. Problem is, I played some of the videos to her and found my argument weakening as I was making excuses for all of their fairly average voices! The truth is, the standard for me has dropped considerably this year; even my favourites (Matt and Aiden, poor guy) aren't actually as amazing as I thought they were - it's just all relative in that they are better than the likes of Wagner who share their stage. 

This thought is a bit depressing and probably ruins it for everyone but hey ho, we get what we're given and this week the amateurs battle it out with some Beatles songs. Which sounds about as fun as listening to Westlife's one hundredth cover album...

Matt
Let's start with a little fact about me: I like a man in a vest. The Bruce Willis, Matt Damon, action man style vest that says 'I have good arms, I'm tough, and could save the world with my little finger'. They make me swoon a bit. OK, a lot. Now here's another fact. Matt should never wear a vest, ever. He is not a vest man. This was a bad, bad, baaaaad decision that should render the decision-maker unemployed. He looked terrible. He also came out and growled 'Come Together' like a drunken chav (the 'chav' part is likely down to the vest). I did wonder if he might be taking the mick because he saw that lovely Aiden was booted out, so he's thought 'sod it' I'll do something ridiculous to prove this show is rubbish (I am still clinging onto this theory with hope). This week also failed horribly because sexy little wiggler Olly Murs from X Factor past sang this song with so much sexual energy he probably impregnated half of England. I hate myself for saying it but Matt, you've lost me. Try and get me back next week and wear the goddamn hat. 

Rebecca
Rebecca fans, avert your eyes. This girl has a lovely voice but my god it needs work. She really needs to get herself to a vocal coach and learn a trick or two, because though the raw quality of it is sweet and treacle-like to listen to, the wobbles are too much and I still don't think that changing notes of Yesterday altogether makes for 'your stamp' on a song. (Judge notes - Dannii is spot on this week, if we can forget - please let's forget - the Matt performance we just witnessed). Rebecca is also wearing some sort of jumpsuit that I do not like and is drippy as ever. NEXT!


One Direction
This week the toddlers are standing on a block to make them look taller. Singing All You Need is Love is a bit weird for these boys because whereas Simon commended Rebecca for believing in the words she sings, these little ones probably don't know what love is and are therefore jumping around on their little building blocks and singing it with as much conviction as fish would. Loving Dannii's comments this week - losing Aiden has woken her up a little. Still, One Direction are probably going to do well because boybands are very 'in' this season, and they can hold a tune as much as any of the others. Westlife, watch your backs...

Cher
Cher is singing Imagine, badly. I've realised that the reason she sounds a bit odd is because she doesn't open her mouth properly when she sings so it comes out very strained while looking like her jaw is stuck. Possibly the most dull performance ever, as I was watching the whole thing wondering if she might topple off the stairs to liven it up a bit. That song is so beautiful, it deserves a Leona-esque voice to do it justice (or, of course, they could just leave it well alone). Dannii liked it. She's off my Christmas card list. Also, why was Cher dressed as a doll? Her weakest week yet by far.

Katie Weasel
There are no words to describe how gutted I was when for some insane reason, the public had saved Katie and not Aiden last week. Un-be-lievable. Literally, I do not believe that to be true. But anyway, the girl is still in, sadly, and singing Help. Funnily enough, Miss Weasel, dying your hair does not make you unrecognisable and therefore I still dislike you, very much. Katie is another one who does actually have a nice tone to her voice but it's not enough - some notes are off, some are just too wobbly, and her try-hard attitude is just so wearing. Plus, we get it already - stop singing songs that are about helping you and saving you - there's nothing less attractive than desperation. 

Wagner
Watching Wagner makes me miss Fame Academy, which despite its name had real songwriters and real singers hoping to do what they love and taking it seriously. What is hilarious though is when we watch him having conversations with Louis, who he clearly cannot understand and doesn't have the time of day for since the bumbling Irish idiot still can't pronounce his act's name. Wagner sings a medley, again - can you imagine his album? It's going to be HOURS long because every song will be a mental medley. I hope he does a Mr Blobby number combined with Everybody Wants to be a Cat, finished with I Will Always Love You. He's the king of bad medleys, he'll wing it. Also, hated Cheryl's little rant - that was completely unnecessary, and if we're not to believe the press in regards to her little witches Cher and Katie then why believe the press about Wagner? I don't know what the truth behind it is, but Simon and Cheryl have clearly decided it's his time to go (probably rightly so) but are going about it very cattily. Someone needs to get them de-clawed.


Paije
Favourite to go out this week based on that thing called the Internet, dear Paije probably felt defeated already - but his was my best performance tonight. Let it Be was a great song choice for the lovely Paije, and I think he may just be my favourite (out of him, Matt, and Aiden... no one else matters) simply because his vocals are strong, smooth and consistent, and there have been no vest incidents (though he does wear some questionable jackets). Do I sound like Simon? Anyway. I feel his square Gerald-from-Hey-Arnold-hair is unnecessary but apart from that, he should have been an outright choice to go through to the shows and not a wildcard - remember Nicolo? No. Paije, you are a legend. I would buy your album. 

Mary
Last week it worked because Mary has a heart, according to Simon. I'm more distracted by her lungs to be honest because Tesco Mary is a shouter. This is my only problem with her - she has a strong (loud) voice and could be good but for some of the lyrics she just speaks them, particularly at the end of a line. Still, it was better than the past couple of weeks and it can't be easy working with Louis, who has also picked up the shouting vibe. Perhaps they are both going deaf in their old age? Mary will be safe for a while because all the mums are voting... I have resigned myself to that. Sigh.


Bottom two - it should have been Wagner and either Cher or even (I'm so, so, sorry husband) Matt this week. Of course, I am writing this a little late so we know Paije got the boot - which we knew would happen given that he was up against Cher. I feel that choosing to sing Stay again was very lazy on Cher's part - perhaps she hadn't even bothered to rehearse a sing-off song as she's convinced she's too cool. Paije's performance was pretty shakey but you can't blame him for that, and I was sad that Louis didn't keep him given that he forced the others to see him again at auditions. I look forward to his album, a few years down the line...
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2 Response to " The X Factor: Live Show 7 Review "

  1. Agreed, X Factor is weak this year. I can't get the show over here (not even on ITV player) so I have to watch the YouTube clips of each performance after the show. But I find myself not bothering to watch most of them now... I pretty much only watch Cher's performance and occasionally a bit of Katie's just out of curiosity.

    I can't stand Wagner but I kinda want him to win this year because everyone else is so boring. Cher's still my favourite though.

    I cringed at Cheryl's unprofessional comments to Wagner (good ol' YouTube), especially when Wagner described what really happened (which was totally feasible).

     

  2. Judy Said,

    Exactly, I have to literally check to see if I've covered everyone in the blog because they're not very memorable! It would be fairly funny for Wagner to win and to reveal what the show has become, but at the same time it would be a shame for those who have really worked their way to this... then again, I'm not sure there's anyone left who actually deserves a record contract yet.

    I guess I am still backing Matt, but any more vest antics and there'll be trouble...

     

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