How Honest is Too Honest?

Posted by Judy Johnson On Sunday, 1 January 2012 12:30
My mouth has got me into trouble quite a few times. From telling my sister when I was 8 that I saw a ghost in our room (sorry, not true) to saying a bit too much on what would otherwise have been the best date ever (still gutted, and pretty sure that’s the reason it ended there!), I tend to be a bit too honest for my own good. 

When I was little, I generally agreed with anything my sister said, even if it meant lying; but then I got older, realised I had an opinion and kind of lost sight of what was helpful and honest and what was just better left unsaid. I'm not talking just the little things, like whether or not you like the wooly jumper your nan got you for Christmas (a white lie never hurt anyone, as they say), but also the bigger things. Do you stand up for yourself if you think someone's done you wrong? Do you tell someone if you think they're wasting their time on someone or something? I seem to lack that filter of when to keep it buttoned and while I LOVE honesty in other people and see it as part of having a backbone, I'm not sure I should always spill the beans.

Recently I’ve either said too much to someone and regretted it (like round the dinner table this Christmas, telling my sister she’s blatantly the tougher, meaner one in her relationship – oops) or heard people moaning about in-laws or friends who just need to keep their thoughts to themselves, even if they do mean well. I’m glad it’s not just me that has honestitis, but at what point do you hold back? I seem to be surrounded by people with strong opinions, which I think is great (far better than an ignorant drip round the dinner table) but sometimes it seems no one wants to hear mine…

Whether it’s about babies (don’t do it like that), men (he’s clearly a prick), family (you’ve made the wrong decision), or work (that’s not how I’d do it), it’s really hard to get the balance right between getting your voice heard and giving good advice, and hurting someone’s feelings – or just making them plain angry.

When do you keep your lips sealed and when do you speak up?
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1 Response to " How Honest is Too Honest? "

  1. Anonymous Said,

    Too true! More about this potential best date please! x

     

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