As any reader of this blog may know, I'm a bit of a moan-y sort. It's not something I'm proud of (apart from when it allows me to write for Grumpy Young Women, which is great). I've been pestered by panic attacks, dabbled a bit in depression and am generally a my-glass-is-half-empty-and-now-you've-gone-and-knocked-it-over-you-idiot kind of person. More importantly, overly cheery types get on my nerves and I am truly suspicious of anyone who walks around smiling all the time (what? It's not natural!). Which is why this blog title is already making me feel a bit queasy but hey, even we grumps can share some happiness sometimes. 

Honestly, I am trying to be a little more positive and a little less of the life-sucks mentality (and doing quite well at it!), and recently I wrote myself a little list of things which helped relax my face into a smile last time I found myself in a bit of a hole. On a serious note, it's not fun when there's a dark cloud hovering over everything while everyone else plays in the sunshine - but there are ways to make it better. 

Music

If you're not on Spotify, rectify that right this minute - you don't know what you're missing out on. Well, I'll tell you - you're missing the Musical Prozac list that myself and Emma Cossey created and listen to fairly religiously when we need a pick-me-up. Admittedly, we're 90s kids and there's a lot of S Club, 5ive and Steps in there (and that's just my contribution) but I defy you not to get up and jump around when any one of the songs on the playlist comes on. Hairbrush hits and dancefloor favourites are in there aplenty, and it's a collaborative list so you can add your own happy hits to it. Music is the biggest helper when I get a bout of the blues - whether I'm jumping around my room like a moron or singing my heart out to Beyonce, I forget what I was sad about and just feel grateful for having ears (not vocal chords).

Exercise

OK, so we all hate hearing that actually, the key to happiness is not slouching on the sofa watching Friends (though in fact I will come to that later) - and working up a sweat can work off those negative feelings. Whether it's dancing around your bedroom (see point one) or going for a quick jog round the block, getting your heart pumping and throwing your energy into something else other than being angry or down is a good way to at least take your mind off your troubles. Do as I do and follow it with a rewarding cuppa and a Hobnob and you'll wonder what all the fuss was about...

Chat

This is a tricky one. I was explaining to a friend recently that when I fall into that pit of self-pity and sadness, the very last thing I want to do is talk to anyone. I, obviously, prefer to shut myself in my room and put 5ive's Keep on Movin' on repeat. But, when I do need a pick-me-up, I find that picking up my phone is often the best way to go. Whether it's to hear my mum talk to me about what she did to her hair this week or to text my friend to simply share that I am blue so she can send me some virtual flowers, just telling someone about it (or distracting yourself with someone else's life for a while) can make things seem a lot simpler. Not sure who to talk to? Get yourself onto Twitter. We're all pretty good listeners.

A fail-safe film

If you're not a lover of film and TV, firstly, what does your furniture point at? And secondly, well this may not work for you, but hopefully you have something to relate it to (a good book?). As a bit of a telly addict and film fan, I have a few fail-safe movies and shows that are guaranteed to make me feel better when I'm down. Obviously, Friends is an easy one and so is Sex and the City (this is not a time for Eastenders). My personal favourite is Home and Away - stop laughing - because I love the show, it's set in Australia where they are forever on the sunny beach and it's easy viewing. Film-wise I have so many I wouldn't want to bore you, but How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Confessions of a Shopaholic and anything Disney are always top of the list. And Bourne, for obvious reasons...

Remembering the past, looking at the future 

One final thing that chills me out a little is to stop thinking about the present. When things get too much, it's always because there is a lot going on and I'm feeling overwhelmed by it all. Whipping out the photo album (or, you know, Facebook) and reminiscing about the good old days is always fun, so long as you don't start sobbing over the waist you used to have or the boy you used to date. I have one particular memory involving my ex, his nan and a very unstable picnic chair that has me crying with laughter every time, and photo-wise a picture of my baby nephew is all it takes to make me smile again. Just look at the happy memories. Even better - plan some new ones. My love of travel always cheers me up, and I look at my globe (a very dear present that takes pride of place in my room), think about where I'd like to go and look up some holiday deals on the net, just to browse. Even if I don't book any, knowing it's out there and that I could do it is something for me to look forward to. 

Everyone will have their own happy list - this is just mine. If you feel down more than you feel up, take a sheet of paper, write down five things that make you smile and stick it on the wall. It might just make you feel better next time things get tough. Oh and also - this is part of a blogging challenge where you have to have a question for a title. Typing 'how to..', 'what is', 'why is..' into Google provides oodles of giggles if you need a quick happy fix. People search for some weird stuff.

What are your happy songs/films/tips?

This post is part of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge series - see all posts in the challenge here!  

After watching and adoring The Blind Side last night, I started thinking that, bad blonde hair dye or not, Sandra Bullock is pretty damn good at her job. And she picks her roles well - I am struggling to think of any terrible films that she stars in, other than perhaps Miss Congeniality 2 which just sounds dire even as a title - they should have stopped at one. So, as I'm a huge film fan and wanting to write a little more about movieland, here are my top five films that the lovely Sandra has starred in...

Easily becoming one of my all time favourite films after having just seen it for the first time, it's safe to say this made an impression. It's captivating from start to finish, makes you want to adopt Michael and the other adorable kid, and won't leave a dry eye in the house - but for all the right reasons. I loved Bullock's character and she suited it down to the ground.

Not a huge Blockbuster, but Hope Floats is a film I love to catch whenever it's on. Sweet,  heartfelt and with fantastic actors including Gena Rowlands (of The Notebook fame) and yummy Harry Connick Jr, I always cry like a baby throughout but it's worth the tears. It's also the owner of a brilliant quote I posted about before - "Beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most."

3) The Proposal
Obviously, the best thing about The Proposal is that Ryan Reynolds is in it - but I thought Bullock was on a different level in this film. She does do comedy well but her uptight, emotionally-closed-off character in this really suited her acting style and had me giggling the whole way through (and my cold heart melted when it had a happy ending, of course). It may just be a silly rom-com but it was one of the greatest films of 2009. 

4) Miss Congeniality
Many a Sunday afternoon was spent wearing out my video (yes, video) of Miss Congeniality back in the day - it's just one of those movies that you can watch again and again. It helps that Benjamin Bratt is gorgeous, of course (sorry, there's a bit of a running theme here isn't there? Nice one Sandra!) but it's also just a fun story in which a superbly camp Micheal Caine gets to dress up Bullock in pretty dresses. Gets my vote.

5) A Time to Kill
I haven't watched this thriller in ages because it's tough viewing, but it is a firm favourite in my DVD collection (yes I have advanced to DVDs now). Matthew McConaughey is flawless alongside Samuel L Jackson, and while Bullock is not the star of it she plays yet another determined, hard-working woman who helps to make sure justice is served at whatever cost. Proof that she is way more than just chick-flick material.

I've left out a few other guilty-pleasure gems such as Two Weeks Notice, Premonition, Practical Magic, Crash and Speed (the latter two are up there with some of my favourite films, but she ruined it with Speed 2 because Keanu wasn't in it) but all in all - Bullock, you rock. 

Whose films do you always love, no matter what the genre? Let me know - I might even blog about it... 

Remember that fantastic Sanctuary facial oil I was telling you about in a recent blog post? Well, I'm still using it religiously because it has solved my winter skin woes and then some - hello silky skin, it's been a while. 

And now thanks to Wahanda - yes this is slightly self-promotional but with good reason - you can try it out too, along with a few other Sanctuary goodies for less than half of the usual cost. Oh, we are good to you...

So, on Monday 28th March we have MobDeals going up for two Sanctuary skincare gift sets, both with more than 50% off the RRP. Plus, these aren't iddly piddly sets of travel-size lotions and potions - these are full size products. Amazing, no? Each set will be £20 and there's a limited number available - so don't wait too long to check them out!

You can either grab the Skincare Spa Heroes set which is pretty much all you need for a mini at-home facial (including my tried and trusted oil), or you can give your skin a boost with the lovely Pro-Collagen kit. Or you know, you could buy both. You are saving money after all...

P.S. Tweet me if you want an extra 10% off as I have a little promocode that I'm allowed to give out to my friends. Perks of the job and all that...

The latest series of Take Me Out finished last week, and already Saturday nights seem dull. If it hadn't been for the fun of Earth Hour, our lights would have stayed on all night, completely uninterrupted. How very 2009. 

But fret not, for the show that brought us 'no likey, no lighty' has also given us something to take away - and that is some great dating advice. No, I do not mean get a tan, find a very short dress in the Lipsy sale and wear three pairs of false eyelashes - I mean learn from what a lot of those couples did wrong. Because let's face it, there were some shockers. It also sparked conversation with my friends who shared some of their dating dos and don'ts...

This one was awkward - the girl kept talking about the previous love of her life and how they should never have really broken up. Then the guy, who was rather lovely too, said that he found it weird to talk about exes on a first date. The girl did not take the hint. If you need to talk about your ex, you don't need to be taken out by anyone but your girlfriends (or guyfriends, if you're the guy who's hung up on Mrs Wrong). Sort your head out first.

This was even more cringeworthy than the first - a guy decided to describe his ideal woman, who was the complete opposite of the woman in front of him - and then said he wasn't sure why he'd picked her. She was probably thinking the same, love (why me? WHY me?! etc). I've had this once - not on a date, though I'd been looking forward to seeing a guy out that I'd met at new year, but when we saw each other all he could say was that he wasn't sure why he'd come along as he hated the bar. Needless to say, I wasn't impressed and didn't text him back...

Always a good one, this - remember what they're called, and repeat it in your head, constantly. Write it down if you have to. Just don't under any circumstances call them something else - especially if it's your ex's name. See point one!

If you're anything like me, you'll cringe when people make noises as they eat (I say cringe, I mean inwardly scream until it stops). The slightest slurp of a drink and my entire body tenses in disgust, and don't even get me started on chomping. Which is why I sympathised (and laughed) when my friend told me the deal-breaker for a recent first date - the guy was sucking the chocolate off their Maltesers, LOUDLY - in the cinema, and it was all she could hear during the quiet scenes. Nothing would put me off my Matt Damon viewing more than hearing someone abuse Maltesers in public. Just don't. 

Easier said than done when nerves are involved, but I think the lights were left on and the sparks were flying a lot more on Take Me Out when the daters had a giggle, got to know each other while having fun in the sun (good ol' Fernando's) and didn't take things too seriously. Whatever you do on your first date, just relax - and 'Let the bees see the knees' as Paddy might say...

What have been your first-date no-nos?

This post is part of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge series - see all posts in the challenge here! 

I love painting my nails. Forget fashion - keeping up with the catwalks is expensive and not all of the trends will suit every shape and size. Nail colours and nail trends on the other hand can be worn by anyone and everyone, and they won't break the bank either. Yes, nail polish to me is what shoes are to Carrie Bradshaw.

So, having already been a huge fan of Barry M's cheap and cheerful (and pretty chip-resistant) nail varnishes for some time, I was first in line to grab the Instant Nail Effects polish when it came out. In case you've somehow missed the buzz, it's a black top coat that you put on over colour - and as it dries, it cracks to leave an instantly and effortlessly cool design on your nails. I've been wearing it over anything and everything - bright corals, pinks and greens are really eye-catching, and at the moment I'm wearing it over gold for an almost leopard-print look. 

So why am I telling you this now? Because it just got better. Barry M have released three more colours - a blue, pink and white - of the shatter polish so that we can have even more fun doing our own manicures. The one I'm struggling with the most is the blue - it's an odd shade so I'm not sure what to layer it on top of, but it still makes a nice change from the black. I've tried them all on black and I think white is my favourite just as it's nice and bright (sorry for the bad application, I started it in candelight thanks to Earth Hour!).

Other brands have released similar products, but at just £3.99 a pop, Barry M is my favourite. What are yours? And what are you layering them on top of?

Though I'm not sure it's fair to call it 'news' since we could probably have worked it out for ourselves, a new health study appeared this week telling us that 'occasional' physical and sexual activity is bad for the heart. So-called 'spikes' in physical activity, such as when you're getting down and dirty once in a blue moon, can actually trigger heart attacks. Well, Eastenders were a step ahead with Phil Mitchell on that one, weren't they?

This really comes as no surprise - we all know we're supposed to exercise regularly, it's just that a lot of us don't. I've lost count of the number of friends I've spoken to who say how appalled they are when they realise they don't actually do any exercise other than walking to the station in the morning. I am one of those people - it's hard to fit it in; costs money unless you're one of those running types (I'm not); and when you're trying to get ahead in your career while socialising enough so that you're not working all the time, plus doing all those other life-niggles such as cleaning the house and making dinner, adding a trip to the gym into that is a little off-putting. Of course, these are all excuses, but valid ones - time is precious when you're a Londoner.

I have a genius idea that could solve this problem - fitness carriages on trains. Seriously. One carriage (more if more people wanted it) that's basically empty floor space, with an instructor doing aerobics as you make your way home. I have a 20 minute train journey that could be put good to use each day if only it were invented... so, Boris, if you're reading, sort it out please.

This probably won't happen any time soon. So my answer? I'm going to try and make exercise part of my routine. Sounds simple, right? I am a girl of routine - I have my cup of tea after 4pm and not a moment before, I have cereal for dinner if I haven't eaten by half nine and I know to start getting ready a couple of hours before I need to leave for a night out in order to have hair that looks photographically acceptable.  So instead of worrying about joining a gym and whether or not I'll find time to go, or finding someone to come to a class with me so that I'm motivated, I'm keeping it simple. 

I've just spent £400 worth of Wahanda vouchers on a block of 24 power plate sessions at Fitness for Every Body in London Bridge - conveniently on my way home from work - and plan to go to a class once a week at least. Knowing it's paid for and all I have to do is pick a class is already a weight off my mind (and will hopefully soon be a weight off my waist). I did my first session this week - and am still aching - and have a double cardio session booked for Thursday. Eeek. 

Next up is walking - now, I have a running argument (unintentional pun) with a friend over whether walking is 'real' exercise, but I believe it is, and given that it's not as intimidating as the thought of running somewhere, I think I can squeeze it in to my daily habits. Having read an article over on That's Fit about a walking plan, I realised that all that's been stopping me is wondering where to walk to  - the only bit of Lewisham that I know particularly well is the mall, and it seems very Cher-from-Clueless to exercise my way to the mall. But if all I need to do is twenty minutes or so at a time, I can walk up the very long hill by my house and back again... and be home in time to have something that isn't cereal for tea. Easy!

I'm hoping putting a few twenty minute stints of simple exercise into my week will take the effort out of it and just make it another thing I do each day - I also own a hula hoop which gets a daily spin and that doesn't even feel like exercise. How do you fit your fitness into your routine?

This post is the first in my 30 Day Blogging Challenge series - see all posts in the challenge here!

Since I was thrown back into singledom I have learned a few things; how to build a flatpack desk all by myself, how to cook lasagne properly (we used to get the ready meal version), and more recently, how we single girls just can't get it right no matter how we're feeling. Someone is always there to question us.

I did the heartbreak, the anger, the throwing myself into another 'relationship'... I did it all, and my friends saw me through it for which I am eternally grateful. But now, now that I am for the most part enjoying being my own person in my single little life, I go through phases of not wanting anyone to come and mix it up followed by phases of wanting a man in my life - but no matter which phase I'm in, someone has to put in their two cents and tell me I'm doing it all wrong.

I know they don't mean to - it's usually my friends that put their foot in it so I know they wouldn't try to make me feel rubbish intentionally - but really, must my love life be commented on just because I am single? I don't meet up with my attached friends and tell them what they're doing wrong in their relationships, so unless I'm asking you what I'm doing wrong (I tend not to ask that, unless there is a lot of wine involved and it's with my best friend who feels the same) I'd prefer a little support rather than all the questions or jibes. Pretty please.

Recently, out in a bar, I made a half-joke that they should have a door policy where they just let in single people who are all over a certain height (I'm talking men, here) so that the likelihood of being chatted up by someone with potential was heightened. I may not have put it quite like that - a bottle of Pinot Grigio had mysteriously been consumed by this point, but it was along those lines. Instant reaction from my (also single but far better at dating) friend - 'Wow, desperate much?'. Ouch. And this just to a joke about wanting to chat to a decent man for a few hours. 

So if I want to find a man and I talk about it, I'm desperate; the lovely Mullies' column over on Cosmo summed that up perfectly, complete with all the cliches I am sick of hearing. No, it won't happen when I least expect it, because to be honest my expectations have been pretty low, or non existent since the last guy I saw and nothing has cropped up thus far. But on the flip side whenever I am more nonchalant about it, and mention that actually I am quite content being single and am not really looking for anything, I get asked why? Why do you not want a boyfriend? What's wrong? 

I was asked this by a very annoying tourist in Zebranos once. His mate had bought my mate a drink so he thought that entitled him to hassle me, while I politely sipped my own drink and prayed he'd disappear. The conversation went something like this after he asked, with a smirk, if I was single:

'Yes.'

'Why are you single?'

'Well, I just am, why is anyone?'

'So, do you want a boyfriend then?'

'No, not right now.'

'But why not? Every girl wants a boyfriend, don't they. I could be a good boyfriend.'

I gulp my wine and tell him I'm off to get another drink.

If it's not random men in bars who won't get the hint that they are pushing ancient on the age scale and could really do with reigning in that pervy tongue, it's friends who just don't understand how I could not be desperate (there's that word again) to get back into a relationship. 'How's your love life?' they ask, as if everybody has to have a love life. 'Why not try online dating?' 'You need to just get out there',  etc etc. I simply can't get it right.

As seen in my recent blog posts, there are pros to being single and cons to the lonely life. Everyone knows that, even those of you who live in perfect pairdom. Sometimes I crave having someone to come home to and snuggle with, and other times I feel secretly lucky to be so independent. But if I am telling you I wish a bar were full of eligible men just for me, don't call me desperate. Pay me a compliment to make me feel better. Or if I am telling you I'd rather be a nun than have a man in my life, don't jump in with the cliches - just let me be right, for once. After all, I don't have anyone else to win arguments with...

Having recently dipped my toe back into the rather cool - icy even - pool of internet dating, I found myself wondering whether this now common way of finding a date is turning us into more critical singletons, with expectations that are far too high. 

With shows like Take Me Out getting me fired up (just check the Twitter feed - sorry to my dear followers), about both the men and women on it, it's all too easy to dismiss someone almost instantaneously because of a less than perfect first impression. Not as tall as you'd like? Lights out.  Lives with his mum? Blackout. Dresses his puppy in little outfits? Bit weird. Likes to dress as a woman and sing? Well, that might be pushing it. 

Back in the day (and this isn't even that far back, for me anyway), you used to see someone, get to know someone and see where it went. Now, in a dating world where it's harder to find a date and anyone and everyone is online in some shape or form, we're getting snappier and stricter with our judgements. And it's not just that we can find them online - even after a first date we can Google them, Facebook stalk them, find them on Twitter or on their blog and see what makes them tick before making a decision, without so much as sending them a message to say thanks for the drink.

With this immediate approval or disapproval in mind, we online daters seem to be looking for Mr or Mrs Perfect - and nothing less will do. I'm hardly in a position to be fussy, that much is clear - and I'm trying to be quite open minded online, putting age differences and usual type aside when browsing. But flicking through some profiles on a site recently left me feeling really rather inadequate (and then, when my senses kicked in, just disappointed) because I wasn't sure I could meet the 'would like to meet' criteria of most of these men. Are we so used to getting the right stuff in just a few clicks that we expect dating to be the same? The top profile put-offs for me so far have been:

So guys, (and girls) - can I make a suggestion? Rather than describe in detail the absolute ideal of the person you are looking for, perhaps make it a little more open to, you know, real people. Cheryl Cole (or enter perfect woman/man here) isn't going to be looking for you on there, but the One might be - don't make them click off in the first second just because they're scared of heights or not a fan of Indian food. You at least want them to be interested enough for them to try and Google you...

OK, so despite my last post things aren't all rosy in the singles camp. They can be a little prickly at times. While I am enjoying my arguments-less, toilet-seat-down freedom, there are a few cons to balance out the pros of being all alone...

 

This one is in both lists because let's face it, even though it's irrelevant rubbish when you're single it can become dull to be the grumpy unattached one who cries out that Clinton's simply invented it to make money out of us all for the first thirteen days of February. Most of those in a relationship can look forward to a guaranteed night of attempted romance, a present, some alcohol and maybe even an engagement. Will he, won't he, ooh the excitement. (He probably won't. It would be a bit uninventive to put it in your dessert at TGI Fridays). 

2. Manly Jobs
Get your minds out of the gutter, I am talking DIY. Around the house. I live in a house with very high ceilings and I do not own a ladder, nor do I want to for heights are not my strong point. This means changing a lightbulb when one of our spotlights goes bang is basically impossible and I have to live in the dark(ish). A man would find some way to sort it out I'm sure - that's his job*. He would also put manly things in my man drawer (Michael McIntyre reference, look it up), and generally be my DIY hero for anything I couldn't manage. (I say this, having built my very own *cough* flat pack *cough* desk, thank you very much). 

*Promise I'm not sexist... I swear boys like to play with tools. And lightbulbs. 

Probably the single reason that could sway me away from liking being single is the lack of hugs going around. There are two people that give amazing hugs: my mum, and my (currently non existent) man. I don't see my mum anywhere near enough since evil National Rail and co keep boosting train prices so much that I struggle to even go back home once a month. Friends give hugs but they are always a quick hello or goodbye - but for the ones I miss, I'm talking about the kind of wrapping-you-up, not letting go for a good half hour type of hug. I miss those. 

I would like a weekend boyfriend. I pretty much had that when doing the long-distance thing and it suited me quite well - too busy in the week for anything but work and sleep, and then lots of spare time at the weekend that needed filling with fun, hugs and getting to know someone better. These days my weekends tend to see me exhausted trying to be creative while also trying to remember how to relax, but really it would be quite nice to have someone to get a Sunday roast with or to watch films all day with... sigh. 

As we saw from my rant about turning a QUARTER OF A CENTURY OLD (I'm not over it yet), being single at 25 wasn't in my plan. Just a few years ago I was thinking about how I would decorate the flat that me and my now ex would buy together one day. Silly, silly me. While that plan is well and truly de-planned (a good thing), a lot of my friends are looking to buy houses, looking at rings in jewellery shop windows, looking at baby scans... and well, they're all settling down a bit. Which makes me feel a little odd, since in my head I could easily still be 18 and the thought of settling down scares the bejesus out of me, because all I want is someone to travel with and to still party with the girls on a Saturday night. It would be nice to have a new plan forming though, or at least some unplanned fun which shows a glimmer of possibility of a plan later on. You know, before I turn 30. Which is just five years away *gulp*...

I'm sure I've missed out a whole load of romantic stuff but let's not depress ourselves, shall we? I still stand by my pros of being single and at the moment, aside from a dark bathroom (seriously, anyone got a ladder they fancy using?) I am pretty happy. Most of the time...

What's that you say? There are good things to be said about singledom? Why yes, I believe there are. Not having a Match.com-advert-like life is actually not the worst thing in the world (it's brilliant, in fact, since I despise those ads). Romance is great, but relationships? Not so much, not always anyway. Just in time for that ridiculous date in the diary that we like to call Valentine's Day and circle with a red heart, I thought I'd put together a little list of things to be grateful for, all thanks to being happily single. And no, it doesn't mean I fail at life, hate couples, am gay or an angry feminist - I just quite like the freedom of being free.

I'm not saying all you gorgeous loved-up people have it bad - we all know you're pretty happy and we're happy for you. (There will, for balance, be a follow up blog on the cons of all this fancy-freedom).

The obvious one to start with - we singles are free from the pain of Valentine's Day. The overpriced cards, the overpriced presents which we have to buy at the last minute because the sweet little handcrafted gift didn't turn out so well, the pressure of finding something to do together that isn't just a meal in Pizza Express. With a coupon. Ahhh, bliss. This Valentine's Day is a Monday too so I don't even have to find a single-but-still-doing-something alternative. Amazing. Thank you, calendar.

2. Money

Closely connected to numero uno but definitely a point (or ten) in its own right is the money, honey. The money I earn goes on me (well, rent), my friends (read: wine with friends), family and nobody else. When I take a little trip to Matalan, I can skip the men's section. I tend to skip the women's section too and head straight for the home bit, but that is not the point. I used to spend a fortune when I was non-single - trips across the UK because of long distance fun, expensive presents, little presents, underwear, cinema trips, petrol, the list went on. Now Christmas is easy because I just spoil my family and I no longer think it's acceptable to go into my overdraft just to travel across the UK for a kiss.

You can have nights out with your friends when you're not single. (No really, you can). But some ladies don't understand that you can also leave the man at home, or that you can put your phone in your bag and he shouldn't mind too much that you haven't updated him about how busy the bar is and what your outrageously drunk friend is up to. Most of my friends are great at enjoying themselves when their other halves are at home or likewise out with the boys, but you can always spot one girl in the room who's got her Blackberry out (fine, iPhone, cool kids) or the one who is stood next to her guy because he had nothing to do and decided to tag along, but is now bored because dancing isn't his thing. My nights out are spent catching up with best friends, laughing as much as possible and dressing to impress - and I will keep that up even when/if I'm not in singlesville. (I do have some great friends though whose other halves are as much fun as they are on a girls' night out - so I hope my next man is one of those, please).

I didn't have too many of these back in the day thankfully, but when we did argue I hated it. I hate confrontation so tended to go quiet and stare at my phone wondering why it wasn't beeping with apologies. I don't miss the disagreements, the questioning of feelings, the second-guessing what the other was thinking - obviously, that relationship ended so clearly wasn't right, but I'm sure every relationship has its little quibbles. These days, the only arguments I have are with the adverts I hate on TV (here comes Match again) and the amount of calories in a Pop Tart. I win every time.

No, not Myspace. My space. Though Facebook probably features in here too, thanks to the lack of relationship status updates, stalking and anguish over why he hasn't put up that lovely photo of you both as his profile picture (this is a general point, not about me, promise). As a detached damsel not-in-distress, I get to do what I want, make a mess of my room if I want (actually, I prefer not to), do my makeup if I feel like it, stay in my perfectly acceptable non-silky pyjamas on a Sunday if I want to and generally have my own space whenever I need it. Wash his smelly socks and give up my bathroom? No thank you. 

Ok, there are plenty of downsides to being back in the world of dating - but while I have a think about those, what have I missed from the sunny side up?